AFR #324 – Too mainstream

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Okay, this is not one of my best.  You may remember that my old computer crapped out on me in the fall and I ended up getting a new one.  Well… the new one just crapped out on me, too.  At least it’s still under warranty, unlike the old one, so it should be getting fixed soon.  But that leaves me without access to my usual files and programs for making AFR.  (They’re all safely backed up this time, so no worries; I learned that lesson the hard way.)  Still, I didn’t want to go another week without a new comic to post.  I was able to scrounge up some old images from my backup and cobble together this week’s nonsense.

If all goes well, I should be back in business next week.  See you then!

AFR #308 – Law of averages

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Blizzard has a problem with over-correcting.  It goes something like this:

 

Players: The limit on daily quests seems a little arbitrary.  I wish could do more in a day.

Blizzard: NO DAILY QUEST LIMIT!  SO MANY DAILY QUESTS!  DAILIES THAT LEAD TO DAILIES!  DAILIES GATED BEHIND OTHER DAILIES!

Players: Wow, that’s a lot of daily quests.  I’m not sure I want to try to keep up with that many.

Blizzard: NO MORE DAILY QUESTS!  EVER!

 

…

 

Players: The server feels kind of empty now that most people are at max level and spending their time raiding.

Blizzard: SERVER MERGES!  CROSS-REALM ZONES!  NEVER BE ALONE AGAIN!

Players: Gee, it’s getting crowded in here.

Blizzard: SOLO SCENARIOS WHILE LEVELING!  INDIVIDUAL GARRISONS THAT PROVIDE ALL YOUR CRAFTING MATERIALS!  NEVER INTERACT WITH ANOTHER PLAYER AGAIN!

 

…

 

But, to be fair, we can hardly blame Blizzard for being all over the map when their interactions with the fan base go something like this:

Blizzard: Here’s a new feature for the game!

Tiny minority of players on the forums: THIS IS A DISASTER!  THE GAME IS RUINED!  THINGS WERE SO MUCH BETTER BEFORE!

Blizzard: We’ve made some tweaks to that new feature.

Tiny minority of players on the forums: THIS IS A DISASTER!  THE GAME IS RUINED!  THINGS WERE SO MUCH BETTER BEFORE!

Blizzard: We got rid of the feature.

Tiny minority of players on the forums: THIS IS A DISASTER!  THE GAME IS RUINED!  THINGS WERE SO MUCH BETTER BEFORE!

AFR #303 – Can’t quit you

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Okay, fair is fair.  I razzed Blizzard last week about flying in Draenor, so it’s time to turn the joke back on us players.  There’s so much negativity out there for an expansion that hasn’t even come out yet (including me– guilty as charged), and we should probably all just lighten up.

The worst, though, is the predictable cadre of people mouthing off all over the internet about how this development or that change is the thing that is going to make them quit the game, cancel their subscription, and take their money somewhere else.  Listen, people, if you don’t enjoy the game, then don’t play.  No one expects you to pay for a game that you don’t find fun.  That’s it.  But don’t expect the rest of us to care and don’t expect your repeated protestations on fansites for a game you supposedly no longer play to make any kind of difference.  Blizzard is not your high school girlfriend/boyfriend: throwing a tantrum and threatening to leave isn’t going to make them change.

AFR #299 – Not quite 300

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Yeah, this joke would have been a little better timed a couple of months ago, back when we still hadn’t heard a peep about Warlords since Blizzcon and everyone was getting fed up with old content and radio silence, but it wasn’t my 299th comic a couple of months ago.  /Shrug.

You’d really think Blizzard would have a better handle on this by now.  I know it’s hard work creating all that new content and I don’t blame them for focusing on the new expansion rather than the passing one, but it seems pretty clear that expansions take about two years to work through their life cycle.  Cramming all the patch content into the first ten months of those two years doesn’t actually help the next expansion come out any faster.  It’s like eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner all before 10 in the morning and then being surprised that you’re hungry at 8 in the evening.

AFR #286 – Distaff dissed

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If you’re a female lore figure in World of Warcraft, expect to have your family and friends brutally slaughtered in front of your eyes.  It’s a rite of passage, like getting your driver’s license.

Even Donna, the little girl in Stormwind, is on her own child-sized version of a rampage of revenge against William for stealing her dolly.  It’s like Blizzard doesn’t know what else to do with female characters.  (Other than, of course, have them pop out a baby or two and then disappear entirely.)